Friday, January 20, 2006
A world of saunas
Dear Marc, did you know there are sauna rafts in Sweden? You can rent your own floating sauna and tuff around the beautiful archipelago of Stockholm. Load up with beer and barbecue and enjoy the starry sky above. What could be better?
Now that we're on the topic of saunas, let me show you a few pictures from the fascinating world of sauna ads. Many homes here have their own saunas. We like to sweat, naked, in the company of others. The sauna-selling market is big and profitable. But everything has its price. For the sauna sellers it is this tricky question: How do you picture naked, sweaty people without offending anyone?
The result is interesting. Take the picture above. Two naked men, engaged in conversation, wrapped in mist. They're almost there. A mirage of sauna pleasures.
Here's another one:
This one is tasteful, don't you think? The sauna lover is decent in terry cloth, leaning against wood, perhaps about to be gazing out at the lovely Nordic summer night. But why is she holding a brush of leaves? I'm telling you the truth now: it's there so she can spank herself. Ask any Scandinavian. Beating yourself up with leaves is tradition. Birchleaves are preferrable as they make for the best spanking. I don't know if this is a flagellant remnant of ancient times. Perhaps they bear witness of a time when you had to pay in Christian pain for the pagan pleasure of a great sauna.
What do I know?
Here's what that looks like, from a different sauna retailer:
Must go. Tomorrow perhaps we can discuss the wonderful world of home spas? Lots of pictures of jolly, middleaged people with drinks all around them.