Friday, October 28, 2005
When I’m a guest on Letterman
Dear Marc, I wonder what you daydream about. I daydream about being a guest on the David Letterman show. Sometimes I know all the cuts and meats. Sometimes I'm one of the star guests. I daydream that I will be one of those young lady guests that he always says look fabulous before yawning and fiddling with his papers, looking like all he wants is for a more interesting guest, like a sports agent guest, to come on the show. But since I’m no longer young and not that pretty I daydream that he might treat me like the interesting guest that I am.
When thinking about this, I often spend most of the daydreaming time considering what to wear. Often I’m wearing a casually elegant outfit such as this:
Or perhaps I should go with the outfit worn by Ms Ryder. But with a slip since I'm kind of a prude.
Below the knees, problems arise. I can not imagine anything making me more nervous than appearing on Letterman. How do people do it? Beta Blockers? Cocaine? Both? Sometimes I think that is what I’ve seen. Did you see when Farrah Fawcett was on Letterman a few years back? Was she high on life alone? Giddy after painting large canvases with the help of her naked body?
Power to Farrah. She went and she confused us. She made a lasting impression. All I know is that I’d be so nervous I wouldn’t be able to walk, especially not in heels. This is where my daydream gets stuck. Would it be okay to appear barefoot on Letterman?
I was talking to P the other day, discussing the qualities of the talkshow. I said: ”But don’t you think it’s difficult to live like Letterman and the band do, having to be away every night. Don’t you think they miss their social life and how do their families take it?”.
Her response was a mild but slightly surprised: ”Don’t you know they tape the show?”.
I am E. I am five.
What will you wear on Letterman?